4^th. Another ten day break frittered away in a centrally-heated fug of hum-drum domesticity, or it would have been if the A66 hadn’t reopened the evening before we were due to go to the Lakes and sample the delights of the Altura Trail in Whinlatter Forest, just outside Keswick. The morning after an anxious day of sky watching and radio listening we congregated in Penrith Little Chef (if three people can be called a congregation) for a post-breakfast breakfast to congratulate ourselves for battling through waist high snow drifts, risking life and limb in the avoidance of conjugal commitments. An hour later we were in a car park which could easily have doubled as a skating rink, frozen-fingered trying to finagle a set of pads into Simon’s back calliper. Faffing over we had no option but to actually ride as a way of filling in the time until we felt exercised enough to retire to the pub for the remainder of the day. In contrast to the snow drifts or stinking swamps we’d left a hundred miles away on the North York Moors the North Loop of The Altura Trail started dry, snow-free and at an amenable angle, curving nicely through the trees. Naturally, it couldn’t last and it wasn’t long before we were panting, skidding and cursing our way up some pleasantly technical zigzags which culminated in a rather less pleasant fire road ascent which appeared never ending, although the views toward Bassenthwaite and the oddly named fell of Barf took some of the sting out of the climb. We were well within the white stuff at the top where some snowy singletrack through the woods brought us out at another brief bit of fire road, then some more through the woods singletrack sections, this was followed a long, downhill section across an open hillside featuring numerous jumps, tabletops, a rhythm section and some berms which have a terminally long drop over the edge for the incautious. Too soon we were back at the car park (the North Loop is around 6 miles) and the entrance to the South Loop. Part of the South Loop was closed owing to the weather conditions, in reality all we had was another zigzag uphill, then a nice, fast downhill which included a few North Shore sections in addition to the usual technical trail features (TTF’s to quote the brochure). This section panned out at around two and a half miles, before we knew it we were back in the car park, looking longingly at the closed for refurbishment café, not having the two days to wait until it reopened, we made do with an energy bar from the bike shop, Cyclewise and masochists that we are, set off to do the North Loop again. I definitely found it easier the second time, Simon reckoned it was harder and Tony just whipped round, barely out of breath as usual.

5^th. A full English in our bellies (courtesy of our excellent accommodation Linnet Hill Hotel to soak up the previous evening’s ale sampling, a dry, bright, sunny morning and a whole day to waste as we saw fit. Well, a few hours before the snow to the north and south of us joined up in the middle but all being well we’d be safely back across the A66 by then. Our ride began with a steady warm up along the old rail track to Threlkeld, then a harder than anyone remembered, tarmac climb up to The Blencathra Centre where we became reacquainted with the snow and ice, the wide track undulates until it drops down to the bridge over Glenderaterra Beck, a large sheet of ice caught out Simon, who found his firm young buttocks no match for Lakeland ice. After the bridge, we shouldered our bikes for a carry through the snow up onto the track along the side of Lonscale Fell - which was surprisingly clean, only the odd patch of frozen stuff to hinder our progress. Caution overcame valour at the crags, icy rock and a thousand foot drop could probably interfere with our pie-eating, Jennings drinking, coffee-slurping lifestyle in a way we’d rather not have to confront. After the crags the nature of the route changes completely, becoming a fast downhill to a small stream, then a bit of uphill to the Skiddaw car park. We were disappointed to see the start of the fine downhill around Latrigg was a sheet of ice but fortunately it didn’t last for long and we were soon back in Keswick, browsing in the local butchers for pies and sausages.

9^th. After battling our way across the A66 last week, we find now it’s our own moors which are still suffering from a surfeit of white stuff. Somehow we managed 12.5 miles today, setting off from a snowy Square Corner, the actual route is irrelevant, suffice to say it did involve more than the occasional out of control moment, coupled with a disturbing lack of technical skill and a lot of laying about in the snow. On the positive side, the sausage baguettes in the café at Osmotherley were a declared a successful menu choice, although they did cause some sluggishness on the last hill back to Square Corner.

17^th. For the third time in 2 months we tried to do the Clay Bank to Kildale ride (over the tops and back through the woods) and once again we were repulsed by Arctic conditions, unable to pedal through swathes of semi-thawed snow. We found an escape route down Jackson’s Bank into Greenhow Plantation which still involved snow drifts and falling off but in a more amenable, gravity-assisted fashion. A pleasant track (pleasant in the summer) led us eastward through the woods, beneath the crags of Botton Head before descending to the fire road near The Incline. For the remainder of today we stuck to tarmac, firstly to Glebe Cottage, then the butchers in Ingleby Greenhow and, less pleasurably, the road back to Clay Bank car park. Clocking up a moving average of a staggering 7 mph, this turned out to be The Terra Trailblazers fastest ride this year, we’ll be dosing up on EPO and becoming roadies next.

23^rd. Actually used a bit of common sense today and planned a route with the prevailing ground conditions in mind, not as clever as it sounds so long as we bear in mind 90% of the off-road tracks wouldn’t look out of place in a reconstruction of The Somme. With this in mind we set off from Kildale and did the majority of Percy Cross Rigg on tarmac before making our way across Codhill Heights to Guisborough Woods, then across to Newton Moor. Sticking with the mud-free theme we decided a descent of the steps down to Roseberry Common would be in order, the greasy rock and distinctly bike unfriendly drainage ditches were our undoing, despite reattempting several sections under the scornful gaze of the assembled summiteers congregated atop Roseberry Topping, we admitted defeat and hoisted our bikes down a few of the trickier sections. A somewhat easier descent to Aireyholme Farm was the next stage, followed by a mixture of tarmac and farm track to Brookside Farm (new tea room, not open on the day we passed but it would be against the Terra Trailblazer ethos not to test it at some time) and ultimately Bank Foot farm via Little Ayton, Easby, and Ingleby Greenhow butchers, to stock up on pies. From Bank Foot a gruesome ascent of Ingleby Bank deposited two broken men at the junction with The Cleveland Way at Tidy Brown Hill, more than ready for almost 4 miles of downhill finishing at Glebe Cottage for calorie replenishment.

25^th. Two rides in the same week, could be in danger of getting fit here. Howard rejoined us today for the first time in quite a while, fresh from sticking plasters on roustabouts and broiling under the African sun. He requested a gentle reintroduction to the pleasures of North Yorkshire, so we duly obliged, having a pleasant pootle around Osmotherley Moor, Clain Woods, Arnecliffe Moor, the caff in Ossy and back to Square Corner via Cod Beck reservoir. All the tracks were surprisingly dry, considering the recent moistness with no more than the odd muddy patch as proof of the dire conditions Howard was expecting. Soon we were back at Square Corner, suffering the effects of the curious micro-climate which invariably means the corner is substantially colder than anywhere else in the world, including Alaska and Siberia, especially cruel for those of us who’ve spent the past month at a constant 32 degrees C.